Here Is The Beehive - Sarah Crossan Review

 

Book - Here Is The Beehive

Author - Sarah Crossan

My Rating - ☆☆☆☆

Ana Kelly can deal with death. As an estate lawyer, an unfortunate part of her day-to-day is phone calls from the next of kin informing her that one of her clients has died. But nothing could have prepared Ana for the call from Rebecca Taylor, explaining in a strangely calm tone that her husband Connor was killed in an accident.

Ana had been having an affair with Connor for three years, keeping their love secret in hotel rooms, weekends away, and swiftly deleted text messages. Though consuming, they hide their love well, and nobody knows of their relationship except Mark, Connor's best friend.

Alone and undone, Ana seeks friendship with the person who she once thought of as her adversary and opposite, but who is now the only one who shares her pain - Rebecca. As Ana becomes closer to her lover's widow, she is forced to reconcile painful truths about the affair, and the fickleness of love and desire.

Funny, frank, and strange, Sarah Crossan's moving novel is wholly original and deeply resonant.

"Maybe it's a gift, to be lonely and OK."

Okay, wow. This book was a whirlwind of emotions for me. In all aspects, it was unlike anything I've ever read before. This book is emotional and you could even say tragic. I loved that it deals with a "taboo" topic like cheating in a way that is real, in a way that is authentic. Cheating or having an affair is something that most people do not agree with, because it is wrong. I liked that this book delved deeper into what it's like to be the one having an affair.

One thing that I was relieved to find was that cheating was definitely not romanticised. Instead, it is presented in a way that is real. Like all things in life, this situation was complicated. For every high there was a low. For every happy moment, there was one of equal sadness that followed. This book is in the perspective of the person having an affair, we see how Ana and Connor's releationship develops, we see how difficult it is for them both, we see how it affects their relationship with their partners and their children and even other family members. From the beginning, the readers are shown the pain that comes with cheating. I liked that Ana and Connor's affair wasn't presented as a thing of beauty.

Here Is The Beehive switches from past to present. In the present, Ana is in a very messy, difficult situation. The man she is currently having an affair with has passed away. This book delves into Ana's feelings of grief, loss and remorse. It shows her struggles in having to deal with this death on her own, with no one to rely on or confide in, with no one to comfort her. There's a undertone of despair in this book that never really leaves. It never fades.

Another thing I had to talk about was Ana's character. Because I love what Sarah Crossan has done with this character. I don't think I've read about a character that feels REAL, like Ana does. And don't get me wrong, I don't mean relatable, I mean she feels human. No human is perfect. People make mistakes, Ana makes a lot of them. And I liked that Crossan didn't shy away from adding some negative aspects to Ana's character. Ana is rude and selfish and even manipulative. There is no justifying Ana's actions. Many of us have seen in our everyday lives how damaging affairs can be to marriages, to the parent's relationships with their children. It isn't pretty. But I actually think Ana regrets her decision. Maybe regret is too strong of a word... like I said, it's complicated. Unfortunately, Ana falls in love with Connor. And when Connor dies, she has to cope with the sense of loss that comes after the death of the man she's in love with. When Connor was alive, she had to cope with the constant rejection, the feeling of being second-best, the acknowledgement that Connor may not love her like she loves him. That's rough, even it is her own "fault", it's a very hard situation to be in. I mean, this line portrays it perfectly:

"You’re always so sad, Ana," she replies. "What you don’t realise is that nobody wants that for you. And you shouldn’t want it for yourself."

Ana suffers through true pain when Connor dies, and she has to deal with that grief alone. Although Connor made Ana happier than she's been a long time, he is also the root cause for her heartbreak and sorrow. Their affair is toxic, and Ana is drowning in shame because of it.

The final thing I wanted to mention was that Sarah Crossan's writing style was beautiful in this book. This book doesn't read like the usual novel. It's written almost in verse form. It reads like a poem of sorts. I loved that little touch, I think the fractured sentence structure went perfectly with the broken characters and the devisive plot of this story.

Overall, Here Is The Beehive is a story of regret, shame, a toxic affair, and pure heartbreak and despair that follows from bad decisions and mistakes. This book evoked such a strong feeling of hatred for the characters and I guess that is how you know Crossan wrote this novel well. I highly recommend, although please be wary if you're sensitive to cheating/affairs. 

That's all from me, keep your head in a book and your heart with the stars.

Thank You ♡

Have a look at my previous post, '4 Reasons Why You Should Read The Wrath and the Dawn.'